Capkopwab is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, egotistical spider.

Capkopwab created the Virgo Supercluster seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Capkopwab, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Capkopwab, she will turn you into a hamster.

Capkopwab's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Capkopwab's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never hurt seals.

4. Never go into violet rooms.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.