Vegmisomt is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, tranquil jaguar.

Vegmisomt created vertebrates two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vegmisomt, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Vegmisomt, it will come to you in dreams.

Vegmisomt's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Vegmisomt's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three aluminium sculptures of Vegmisomt on top of important buildings.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not hurt gulls.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not shave your head.