Cimrullfon is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, staggering donkey.

Cimrullfon created snails five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cimrullfon, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Cimrullfon, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Cimrullfon's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Cimrullfon's Holy Commandments

1. Cimrullfon loves voles, so they must be respected.

2. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Run away from yellow cats, for they are unholy.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.