Xinvadjatquampakbogaf is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, competent sheep.

Xinvadjatquampakbogaf created the universe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Xinvadjatquampakbogaf, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Xinvadjatquampakbogaf, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Xinvadjatquampakbogaf's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Xinvadjatquampakbogaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never eat lemons.

3. Do not kill turtles.

4. Do not shave your head.

5. Never look in ponds.