Hamzogfub is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, duplicitous donkey.

Hamzogfub created a down quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hamzogfub, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Hamzogfub, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Hamzogfub's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Hamzogfub's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never think ill of sick eagles.

4. Erect a large iron sculpture of Hamzogfub on top of all buildings.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hamzogfub.