Bagcissjin is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, contented newt.

Bagcissjin created a quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Bagcissjin, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bagcissjin, she will throw large rocks at you.

Bagcissjin's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Bagcissjin's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about stars.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never think ill of sick moths.

4. You must never eat spinach.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.