Voldabbam is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, quiet gerbil.

Voldabbam created the Sunflower Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Voldabbam, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Voldabbam, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Voldabbam's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Voldabbam's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed garlic to snails while wearing fawn rings.

2. Always help pigs in need.

3. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Never skip near dogs.

5. Never play with disobedient children.