Arnwabjinfunominrotcatbap Vonkrutnegmadcem is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, dishonourable wyvern.

Arnwabjinfunominrotcatbap Vonkrutnegmadcem created a top quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Arnwabjinfunominrotcatbap Vonkrutnegmadcem, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Arnwabjinfunominrotcatbap Vonkrutnegmadcem, he will boil you in a big pot.

Arnwabjinfunominrotcatbap Vonkrutnegmadcem's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Arnwabjinfunominrotcatbap Vonkrutnegmadcem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not kill goats.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. You must pray to Arnwabjinfunominrotcatbap Vonkrutnegmadcem eight times a day.

5. Do not dye your hair red.