Bimgessgof is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, self-confident clam.

Bimgessgof created the Sombrero Galaxy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bimgessgof, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bimgessgof, she will destroy your home solar system.

Bimgessgof's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Bimgessgof's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in holy places.

2. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Bimgessgof.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.