Yattsaswig is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, omnipotent weasel.

Yattsaswig created time and space three million years ago.

If you believe in Yattsaswig, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yattsaswig, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Yattsaswig's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Yattsaswig's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate birds.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Always look after injured turtles.

5. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.