Tarortlarg is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, thoughtless salamander.

Tarortlarg created silver eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tarortlarg, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tarortlarg, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Tarortlarg's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Tarortlarg's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if seven seals approach from the south.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Put Tarortlarg first in all things.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.