Pogmon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, merciful duck.

Pogmon created viruses three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pogmon, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Pogmon, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Pogmon's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Pogmon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.