Kopflisdad is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, irritating owl.

Kopflisdad created time and space nine million years ago.

If you believe in Kopflisdad, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Kopflisdad, she will not care at all.

Kopflisdad's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Kopflisdad's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick pigs.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kopflisdad.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

4. Do not wear silicon on your body.

5. Never talk about stars.