Bissgetpig Lanzigvegzog is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, egotistical camel.

Bissgetpig Lanzigvegzog created bats six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bissgetpig Lanzigvegzog, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Bissgetpig Lanzigvegzog, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Bissgetpig Lanzigvegzog's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Bissgetpig Lanzigvegzog's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Bissgetpig Lanzigvegzog.

2. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Respect your elders.