Podbapfoss is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, generous whale.

Podbapfoss created oxygen five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Podbapfoss, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Podbapfoss, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Podbapfoss' most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Podbapfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate porpoises.

2. Hide if seven tortoises approach from the east.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not take Podbapfoss' name in vain.

5. Do not chop down trees.