Nuljapteen Gigpinfutrap is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, fussy troll.

Nuljapteen Gigpinfutrap created the Small Magellanic Cloud four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nuljapteen Gigpinfutrap, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Nuljapteen Gigpinfutrap, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Nuljapteen Gigpinfutrap's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Nuljapteen Gigpinfutrap's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about galaxies.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a building before entering it.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not speak about nuts.