Guppibtin is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, weak snail.

Guppibtin created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Guppibtin, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Guppibtin, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Guppibtin's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Guppibtin's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Guppibtin on top of all buildings.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Do not hurt goats.

4. Never wear magenta corsets.

5. Do not stand on grass.