Monladwip is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, unthoughtful chinchilla.

Monladwip created the planet Jupiter seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Monladwip, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Monladwip, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Monladwip's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Monladwip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Do not wear gold on your body.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never paint your head red.

5. Do not eat garlic.