Tigbassit is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, amazing porpoise.

Tigbassit created a Higgs boson two years ago.

If you believe in Tigbassit, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Tigbassit, she will turn you into a worm.

Tigbassit's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Tigbassit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear pink clothing.

2. Never talk about monkeys.

3. You must pray to Tigbassit nine times a day.

4. Never eat cucumbers.

5. Respect your elders.