Gembogwapvabhimdot is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, temperamental squid.

Gembogwapvabhimdot created a photon eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gembogwapvabhimdot, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gembogwapvabhimdot, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Gembogwapvabhimdot's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Gembogwapvabhimdot's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no manatees in a room before entering it.

2. Gembogwapvabhimdot must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not wear titanium on your body.

4. Always help shrews.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.