Methakpang is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, egotistical whale.

Methakpang created the Tadpole Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Methakpang, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Methakpang, he will be very unhappy.

Methakpang's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Methakpang's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine nickel sculptures of Methakpang on top of important buildings.

2. Do not eat lentils.

3. Methakpang must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not wear silicon on your body.