Fasmotflat Bustaldussmisgepbunsaw is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, dishonest whale.

Fasmotflat Bustaldussmisgepbunsaw created energy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fasmotflat Bustaldussmisgepbunsaw, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Fasmotflat Bustaldussmisgepbunsaw, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Fasmotflat Bustaldussmisgepbunsaw's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Fasmotflat Bustaldussmisgepbunsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if three horses approach from the south.

2. Always make sure there are no turtles in a room before entering it.

3. Never feed bananas to rats while wearing blue shoes.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.