Labnegcen is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, unfair fly.

Labnegcen created a top quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Labnegcen, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Labnegcen, he will not invite you to parties.

Labnegcen's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Labnegcen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never think about stars.

3. Do not dye your hair gray.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Erect a large iron sculpture of Labnegcen on top of all buildings.