Gepstiknar is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, ruthless human.

Gepstiknar created vertebrates two years ago.

If you believe in Gepstiknar, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Gepstiknar, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Gepstiknar's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Gepstiknar's Holy Commandments

1. Always help grasshopers in need.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Always make sure there are no manatees in a building before entering it.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never think about planets.