Quimontsig is a god.

It takes the form of a small, pitiless fish.

Quimontsig created energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quimontsig, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Quimontsig, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Quimontsig's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Quimontsig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt aardvarks.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never eat corn.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.