Honquaflak is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, boastful wyvern.

Honquaflak created the Sun four billion years ago.

If you believe in Honquaflak, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Honquaflak, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Honquaflak's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Honquaflak's Holy Commandments

1. Honquaflak loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

2. Feed all hungry cats.

3. Put Honquaflak first in all things.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never write about amino acids.