Tabgodstik Cubnatwigtetti is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, charitable armadillo.

Tabgodstik Cubnatwigtetti created a down quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tabgodstik Cubnatwigtetti, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tabgodstik Cubnatwigtetti, he will turn you into a rock.

Tabgodstik Cubnatwigtetti's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Tabgodstik Cubnatwigtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never bounce near moths.

3. Always help sick geese.

4. Hide if nine porpoises approach from the south.

5. Do not eat beans.