Didlistdod is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, selfish badger.

Didlistdod created Africa eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Didlistdod, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Didlistdod, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Didlistdod's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Didlistdod's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into fawn rooms.

2. Always help mites.

3. Never hurt great tits.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Never talk about asteroids.