Shavwipmon is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, contented jaguar.

Shavwipmon created the Virgo Supercluster five billion years ago.

If you believe in Shavwipmon, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Shavwipmon, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Shavwipmon's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Shavwipmon's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

5. Never look at asteroids.