Ditbomfut is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, prudent tortoise.

Ditbomfut created the planet Jupiter four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ditbomfut, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Ditbomfut, it will turn you into a rock.

Ditbomfut's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Ditbomfut's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never eat corn.

3. Never paint your head fawn.

4. Never talk about asteroids.

5. Always obey Ditbomfut's priests.