Fitnarlbug is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, passionate squirrel.

Fitnarlbug created bats nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fitnarlbug, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Fitnarlbug, she will turn you into a slug.

Fitnarlbug's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Fitnarlbug's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about moons.

2. Always help snakes in need.

3. Never look at galaxies.

4. Never skip in holy places.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate tapirs.