Bossjigweg is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, witty jaguar.

Bossjigweg created the Whirlpool Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bossjigweg, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bossjigweg, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Bossjigweg's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Bossjigweg's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit near hamsters.

2. Put Bossjigweg first in all things.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not listen to music.