Gadwadkiphubyik is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, loving mink.

Gadwadkiphubyik created humanity five billion years ago.

If you believe in Gadwadkiphubyik, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gadwadkiphubyik, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Gadwadkiphubyik's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Gadwadkiphubyik's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never paint your face brown.

4. Always obey Gadwadkiphubyik's priests.

5. Never think about the strong nuclear force.