Quatkimtetti is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, tiresome snake.

Quatkimtetti created the world six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quatkimtetti, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Quatkimtetti, she will jump up and down on your head.

Quatkimtetti's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Quatkimtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Quatkimtetti.

2. Do not dye your hair orange.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Feed all hungry capybaras.

5. Quatkimtetti loves voles, so they must be honoured.