Tailgovgod Tonmipvin is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, deceitful centaur.

Tailgovgod Tonmipvin created a charm quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Tailgovgod Tonmipvin, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Tailgovgod Tonmipvin, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Tailgovgod Tonmipvin's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Tailgovgod Tonmipvin's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Tailgovgod Tonmipvin's priests.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Gulls are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never go into orange rooms.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.