Stigsawceb is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, irritating gerbil.

Stigsawceb created the cosmos eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stigsawceb, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Stigsawceb, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Stigsawceb's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Stigsawceb's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if three hamsters approach from the east.

2. Do not hurt snakes.

3. You must love Stigsawceb.

4. Always obey Stigsawceb's priests.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.