Litponweenelsakcemkonhat is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, irritating centaur.

Litponweenelsakcemkonhat created time and space three million years ago.

If you believe in Litponweenelsakcemkonhat, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Litponweenelsakcemkonhat, it will turn you into a tree.

Litponweenelsakcemkonhat's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Litponweenelsakcemkonhat's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Hide from white moths for they are unholy.

5. Do not drink water in brown rooms.