Rigweepod is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, all-powerful frog.

Rigweepod created dark energy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rigweepod, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rigweepod, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Rigweepod's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Rigweepod's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Rigweepod must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never go into turquoise rooms.

4. Always make sure there are no mites in a room before entering it.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.