Jamcarnutt is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, smart dryad.

Jamcarnutt created humanity three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jamcarnutt, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Jamcarnutt, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Jamcarnutt's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Jamcarnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into fawn rooms.

2. Do not eat pineapples.

3. Never jump in holy places.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Always help great tits in need.