Zenbodmut is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, selfish mole.

Zenbodmut created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zenbodmut, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Zenbodmut, she will be very unhappy.

Zenbodmut's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Zenbodmut's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if three ants approach from the west.

2. Hide from purple voles for they are unholy.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never write about moons.

5. Never wear magenta hats.