Flabpidlarg is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, emotional clam.

Flabpidlarg created the Sol system three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flabpidlarg, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Flabpidlarg, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Flabpidlarg's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Flabpidlarg's Holy Commandments

1. Flabpidlarg loves tortoises, so they must be honoured.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Flabpidlarg.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never feed strawberries to snakes while wearing violet shoes.

5. Never think about gravity.