Fabtannill Flyfaggup is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, temperamental tortoise.

Fabtannill Flyfaggup created the planet Saturn three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fabtannill Flyfaggup, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Fabtannill Flyfaggup, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Fabtannill Flyfaggup's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Fabtannill Flyfaggup's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fabtannill Flyfaggup.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. You must love Fabtannill Flyfaggup.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.