Basthimbarn is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, smart fox.

Basthimbarn created dark energy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Basthimbarn, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Basthimbarn, he will curse you with boils.

Basthimbarn's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Basthimbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear blue clothing.

2. Basthimbarn must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not hurt whales.