Arpbeptik is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, unfair whale.

Arpbeptik created everything that exists four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpbeptik, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Arpbeptik, he will turn you into a dog.

Arpbeptik's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Arpbeptik's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Never talk about swans.

3. Hide from fawn capybaras for they are unholy.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Arpbeptik must be the most important thing in your life.