Fudpodnar is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, thoughtless mole.

Fudpodnar created the world nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fudpodnar, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fudpodnar, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Fudpodnar's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Fudpodnar's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Always treat frogs with great respect.

3. Erect five titanium sculptures of Fudpodnar on top of important buildings.

4. Do not speak about bananas.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.