Vabnutjip is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, effective fox.

Vabnutjip created everything that exists eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vabnutjip, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Vabnutjip, he will be very sad.

Vabnutjip's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Vabnutjip's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your back turquoise.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Hide if five bats approach from the west.