Jopgofrot is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, awesome crocodile.

Jopgofrot created everything that exists eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jopgofrot, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Jopgofrot, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Jopgofrot's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Jopgofrot's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick monkeys.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Jopgofrot loves hamsters, so they must be honoured.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Feed all hungry rats.