Nartkomfoss is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, prudent swallow.

Nartkomfoss created a quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Nartkomfoss, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Nartkomfoss, she will think nothing of it.

Nartkomfoss' most sacred site is Camon in France.

Nartkomfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nartkomfoss.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never paint your chest violet.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.