Cidnuttpig is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, cheerful shrew.

Cidnuttpig created carbon six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cidnuttpig, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Cidnuttpig, it will laugh at you.

Cidnuttpig's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Cidnuttpig's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick seals.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Respect your elders.