Fitzanlap is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, sage mongoose.

Fitzanlap created the Cigar Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fitzanlap, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fitzanlap, she will turn you into a duck.

Fitzanlap's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Fitzanlap's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

2. Always help sick dolphins.

3. Never hurt manatees.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not chop down trees.